I don’t want to beat this dead bloggernacle horse too much, but yesterday’s elders quorum lesson brought a couple of things up I wanted to address here. I should point out that I did address them there as well.
The lesson was titled “The Noble Calling of Parents”. Naturally, the discussion led to the roles mothers and fathers play in raising a family.
The first thing that irked me was when someone said that motherhood is the more important of the two parental roles. I entirely disagree with this statement. Motherhood is not more important than fatherhood. In fact, fatherhood is not more important than motherhood. They are equal. Neither is better or more necessary. Both mother and father may have different roles in raising children, but each role is essential.
Actually, I find the idea that motherhood is more important to be somewhat offensive, suggesting that my role as a parent is less valued than Mary’s. Is it any wonder so many fathers take a backseat role in raising children? After all, if we’re regarded as less than mothers anyhow, why not let mothers live up to the expectation.
Another statement that irked me was the idea that women are more patient (or compassionate, or kind, or understanding, etc) than men. If this really is true, I wouldn’t be surprised if it was due to cultural conditioning within the Church. After all, if men are repeatedly taught they are not naturally patient, compassionate, loving and so forth and need the priesthood to have those qualities, perhaps they start to believe it.
In our home, I am the more patient one. I am the one who gets frustrated less easily. I am the one who can react more calmly in a stressful situation. Mary isn’t a loose cannon or just hanging by a string?¢‚Ç¨‚Äùdon’t get me wrong?¢‚Ç¨‚Äùbut in this case, we don’t fit the stereotypical mould.
One other comment was regarding mothers working at home. Some members of the quorum used the Proclamation to say that a woman’s place is in the home. I pointed out that the proclamation does not say a woman is to stay home or not work outside of the home; it says that she should nurture the children.
One brother made a comment along the lines of how children could be nurtured if they are in daycare. I suppose the same way as if they were in grade two or grade nine.
If there was one thing I came away from that lesson with (besides an appreciation for the instructor for inciting so much discussion and participation), it is the fact that I am tired of the downplaying of men’s roles and attributes simply in an effort to appease the feminists (i.e. women should stay home, but they are more loving and motherhood is more important, etc).