Why I Hate Homeschooling

Sure, it’s got its positives and negatives. But, this just about wraps it up for me:

http://www.ericdsnider.com/blog/2008/03/26/childrens-letters-to-raven-symone-xv/

Check out the Jan 27, 2008 response to see what I’m talkin about. No kidding, when I read that, I stopped laughing and got a little choked up. I wish I could invite Jessica over to our house so she could play guitar hero with my daughters.

Suffer the little children…

27 thoughts on “Why I Hate Homeschooling”

  1. She should live in Lethbridge. She’d have a lot more friends than she does now (assuming what she said is true and she really is Jennifer).

    I thought Raven’s response was funny.

  2. Lol, that is too funny. But I can tell you, homeschooling isn’t the fault of why she has no friends :) Tell that to my home schooled daughter who can hardly move for the friends she has.

    The grammar and spelling in all of the messages leave so much to be desired. What ARE they teaching children these days???

  3. I honestly wonder about the authenticity of Jessica’s email, but maybe I am just being cynical. It’s interesting how people jump on that comment immediately and assume that this is the reason, instead of thinking there might be more to her situation. Unless her parents keep her holed up without any access to the outside world, she will have the opportunity to make friends. It could also be that she is so desperate for Raven’s attention (who I remember as being a little girl when I was no more than a teenager!)that she is exaggerating. But no, let’s automatically think homeschooling is the bane of any social existence. (Uh…nope, come see the homeschooled children I know and tell me if they suffer from lack of friends. Not likely. My 9 year old for one, could make a friend in the middle of the antarctic. She would find SOMEONE to be her friend no matter what it took.)

  4. Do you think your kids would be a socialized if they didn’t attend or belong to a church organization, Mary or Kim?

  5. Yes.

    The vast majority of their friends are outside of church. At our daughter’s most recent birthday, for example, 2 of the 12 girls were from church.

    For me, all my socialization happened outside of class time, so I don’t see why not being in school would make any difference with a child’s ability to socialize.

  6. Of course they would. We don’t keep them tied up in the basement with no outside contact. It’s not hard to be “socialised” if you have contact with the outside world. Our children do more than just go to Church. I know other homeschoolers who aren’t religious in any way and don’t go to church. They are just as ‘socialised’ as any non homeschooler.

    Besides that you couldn’t keep them away from their friends very easily. They enjoy being with friends and others. And we have taught them how to treat other people. That’s my job as a parent, it isn’t the school’s job to teach them how to be nice (they can encourage a parent’s teaching, but really that is the parent’s job).

    The whole ‘socialisation’ argument about homeschooling is archaic and incorrect. Socialisation means learning to interact with others in a meaningful, proper and respectful way. Going to school doesn’t necessarily ensure that, nor does doing anything else in particular. When children learn to treat others with respect, and are given the opportunity to do so, they learn. I certainly went to school with some socially inept people and they were never homeschooled. You will find them in all walks of life, group schooled or not.

    I suppose I could ask someone who sends their children to public school “Are your children more prone to violence because they go to school?” Ridiculous question, isn’t it?

  7. “It’s not hard to be “socialised” if you have contact with the outside world. “

    and…

    “I certainly went to school with some socially inept people and they were never homeschooled.”

    Seem to be in contradiction with each other.

    “Socialisation means learning to interact with others in a meaningful, proper and respectful way. “

    And in this regard I was just referring to the fact that sans the seven hour of forced socialization (school), home-schooled kids that stay at home during this period are only available to socialize for half the time a public school child is.

    Lacking a high participation social experience (like church), I was questioning whether a home school child is at an inherent disadvantage to social experience.

    If your experience with your children has shown you that that is not the case, fair enough. I think the question has to be asked, though.

    In regard to the question on violence, I would actually concur with the assertation that exposure to public schools with a violence or bullying problem does make children who attend more prone to bullying and violent behaviour.

  8. the seven hour of forced socialization (school)

    How does sitting in a desk and staring at a teacher teach one how to interact socially with others? Maybe school has changed in the last 17 years, but there was little socializing during class time when I was in school.

    home-schooled kids that stay at home during this period are only available to socialize for half the time a public school child is

    Home schooled children don’t have a 7-hour-per-day curriculum, and they socialize with other homeschooled children.

    Take our children, for example. During the day, they take swimming classes, gymnastics, racquetball, and a generic PE class, all at the Y (not all on the same day mind you). The bulk of those in their classes are other homeschooled children. They learn teamwork, meeting new people, creating/maintaining friendships, respecting authority, and how to learn.

    And that’s saying nothing of interacting socially with their siblings and parent(s) more than public schooled children.

  9. Well, I don’t know about all homeschooled children, but mine don’t stay home for 7 or 8 hours. We do sit down work in the morning and then are out doing other things, field trips, the YMCA, ballet, soccer (seasonal), art classes, Nature Centre, what have you. Oh yes, shopping, recycling, park (not often enough for their comfort). To compare this to public schooled children, I would say they get more opportunities for socialising. In school you aren’t allowed to interact during school time except in group situations approved by the teacher. My children have 3-4 hours of school work and after that they have the rest of the day in which to participate in other activities. We would still do these things without church.

    Not sure how those two phrases totally contradict each other. Let me explain. School doesn’t socialise. People do. So if people see other people and interact they can become socialised (depending on how they interact). But these “socialisation” standards that seem so important to non homeschoolers (and yet public school doesn’t seem to add much to proper socialisation) there are plenty of examples of children who were public schooled who didn’t seem to benefit from the alleged socialising aspect so it seems to me that socialisation comes from another source. Not school. Merely being with other children doesn’t create proper socialisation.

    I wasn’t really asserting that public schooled children are more violent. Probably some are. But I doubt that has anything to do with school itself. Just as lack of socialisation wouldn’t have anything to do with homeschooling. Other sources are likely the culprit.

  10. “In school you aren’t allowed to interact during school time except in group situations approved by the teacher. “

    “…but there was little socializing during class time when I was in school.”

    Yes, it appears you both had different experiences with interaction between kids and teachers than I experienced and my children experienced at public school.

    Group interaction and teacher led discussion seems to be stressed even more now than when I went to school.

    I’d also assert that social interaction without parental oversight is also important to correct childhood development. Does homeschooling allow for a scenario like that?

    I know one technique for strengthening one’s position on a topic is to recognize and overcome the weaknesses of one’s position. Would you say there are any inherent weaknesses to homeschooling?

  11. I’d also assert that social interaction without parental oversight is also important to correct childhood development. Does homeschooling allow for a scenario like that?

    Sure. My previous comment gives several examples of this. Other than field trips and trips to the park, we don’t participate in their other activities.

    Would you say there are any inherent weaknesses to homeschooling?

    Sure. It is too easy for unmotivated/apathetic parents to screw up their children’s education. I don’t know of any, but I assume some must exist somewhere.

  12. My homeschooled daughter has more friends than her public schooled mom (yours truly) ever did.
    And frankly, while I agree that kids need time away from their parents, I think we’ve reaped in whirlwind in terms of the behavior we see in youth today, which is for the most part the product of kids being left to raise one another for 7-8 hours a day. My 12-year old receives compliments often concerning her behavior and social skills (introducing herself to coaches and adult scouting volunteers, etc.). Perhaps this is because she was raised by an adult, and not other children.

  13. That’s so sad! I homeschool my daughter and she has lots of friends to play with, and a couple of very close friends. I wonder if the mom is aware of how her daughter feels.

  14. One thing that many overlook is that, while the majority of people in the world today-ncluding homeschoolers-live in urban areas, some do not. My hs daughter seems to be suffering socially despite my efforts, in part because we cannot go to such places as often as urbanites. PS was her source for socialization. Now it is a struggle.
    Do not assume everyone lives within 30 miles of a city.

  15. When I was young, and stupid, I had some problems with alcohol, so my parents took me from school. I started homeschooling, graduated it and went to MIT. Today I have my own children and I’m thinking what should I do. The problem with homeschooling is the lack of communication with other kids of your age.

  16. My comment may not be welcomed here as this seems an adult disscussion, but i am homeschooled. i do all of the work myself straight out of the book. i have friends, but i dont have any opportunities to meet new people. sure i could go to the park or what not, but i wouldnt necessarily find any long term aquaintances. the problem i have with homeschooling is just that. there arent many opportunities for kids, young or old, to meet new people. P.S. i am in high school.

    1. Our children are homeschooled, and they have a tonne of opportunities to meet new people: gymnastics, ballet, soccer, Kung Fu, swimming, floor hockey, racquetball, free time at the Y on Fridays, library programmes, church activities, playing with the neighbour children, and so on.

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  18. Hi!! I strongly believe homeschooling would be best for my children. :-) The only problem is I DON’T KNOW HOW TO GO ABOUT IT!! lol All the websites I’ve looked at don’t tell me what I want to know, like how to start up, the costs involved, who to register with… I’m clueless!! If someone could help me I would be eternally grateful! Many thanks, keep up the excellent work!

    1. Jennifer, where do you live? There are sites that can give you curriculum, but if you are in Alberta, I can send you some great resources. Send me a private email. Sorry I didn’t see this before, I received no notifications.

  19. I’m in ninth grade but I would like to start homeschooling but my mother thinks that I should be with people my own age at school. She claims that if I do homeschooling I will become anti social; but that is why I think homeschooling would be good, I already don’t like people. Please help me! Give me some advice on how I can socialize while doing homeschooling that would please my mother! (Also, if anyone has any ideas how to do homeschooling in southern Alberta please help!)

    1. I do not reccomend homeschooling at all unless your parents actually know what they are doing and have money. Im a homeschooler who is supposed to be in 9th grade but i dont have any curriculum to work with except my moms old college books that she never used. My mom thought it would be a great a idea to homeschool me when i was in 6th grade. So far she has done a HORRIBLE job. I dont get to do anything because we dont have any money. I take guitar lessons but cmon. You dont really meet anyone except the teacher. When i try to talk to people my age they dont really want to talk to me because they already have their own friends. I tried to tell my mom i wanted to go back to public school but she had a meltdown and made it the her show. So basically i dont do anything ecept stay at home to babysit my sibling and clean while my mom goes out to meet her friend, i dont have any curriculum to work with and as a result im falling behind rapidly, i have no friends AT ALL. And im pretty sure i need a therapist for severe depression. Do not homeschool. And if your kids say they dont like homeschooling, listen to them! Homeschool is horrible!

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