Can I lust after my wife?

In Matt 5:28 and D&C 63:16, we read that if we look a woman to lust after her, we have committed adultery in principle, if not in deed.

Now, I get the idea that if I look at a woman to lust after a woman who isn’t my wife, it could potentially lead to thoughts or attraction, which itself could lead to more serious and complex issues.

That being said, both passages do not say “look on another woman to lust after her”. They specifically state “look on a woman to lust after her”.

Assuming this indefinite article is used on purpose, does that mean if I lust after my wife, that I commit adultery in my heart? Is this scripture more about respecting women and relationships than it is about warning against infidelity?

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Laws of the Land

Well now that I have edited this I will repost ;)

On Sunday in our Gospel Doctrine class, we discussed the laws of the land versus the laws of God. I asked the question “If the laws of the land go against what you know to be the laws of God, and He requires you to follow the laws of the land, which do you follow? Answers were given about Egypt, slavery, days of Joseph Smith etc. I kept saying that the days of Joseph Smith pertained to trying to write the constitution and give religious and personal freedom to all. None of the examples that were given (IMHO) had anything to do with us as Canadians living today.

As there are always such great answers here I thought I would post my question here and see if I can get an answer that would satisfy me. Thanks

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Why it’s a good thing I am no longer elders quorum president

I had an experience today in elders quorum that confirmed not only was it right for me to no longer be elders quorum president, but that the person who replaced me was the right person for the job.

We meet for elders quorum on the stage. In December, this means a week or two when decorations for the ward parties remain on the stage because no one wants to put them away. This used to frustrate me every year. Mostly because I was the one who had to move them out of the way to make room for the chairs, table, and chalkboard.

Sure enough, when we walked on the stage for our quorum meeting this afternoon, there was the Christmas tree and rocking chair. Again, I rolled my eyes in exasperation, but I was glad it wasn’t me who had to move everything.

But our quorum president surprised me.

He plugged in the tree, and turned on the lights. He had arranged the chairs in a semi-cirlce (there were only 6 of us; many stayed home because of this weekend’s blizzard) around the tree, and pulled up the rocking chair to the front of the class and beside the tree.

It was a really festive, cozy touch, and I think it really made a difference. It certainly was a participative class.

Some people complain and grumble; others make lemonade.

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New calling: Executive Secretary

I was set apart as the newest executive secretary in our ward today. I was called last Sunday, but have yet to be released as gospel doctrine instructor. Hopefully I won’t have to do both.

The previous executive secretary phoned me about a week and a half ago to ask me to pray in priesthood opening exercises, and he said we needed to get together since I was taking over from him. That was the first I had heard of this. As a result, it was hardly a surprise when the first counsellor in the stake presidency phoned asking me to meet with him

Secretly, I was hoping to be the new ward clerk, the current one was called to the high council. I had been ward clerk previously, and it was my most favourite calling. Unfortunately, I served for only 8 months.

Coincidently, I was gospel doctrine instructor for only eight months. The part I am going to miss the most is not teaching Old Testament next year. I was really looking forward to that.

I guess my reprieve from meetings was meant to be short.

If anyone is interested, here are the callings I have had since I was married in 1995:

  • elders quorum second counsellor
  • elders quorum president
  • ward mission leader
  • stake mission secretary
  • young men president
  • ward clerk
  • elders quorum president
  • Gospel Doctrine instructor
  • executive secretary

Nope. No ward bulletin editor.

Popularity: 2% [?]

Too early for Christmas

Our local radio station posted on their FB page a couple of days ago a question about whether or not people felt that it was too early to start getting ready for Christmas. There were a LOT of replies ranging from November 1st was way too early, stores shouldn’t have their decorations and merchandise out already, parents were posting that their children drive them wild with wanting all the toys that are now out, that it leads to commercialism, that it is never too early to get ready for Christmas etc.

I posted that I happen to believe that it is never too early to decorate your home and start preparations. For me I love Christmas and all it represents and not just for the merchandise. I also mentioned that it is up to parents to prepare their children all year about the real meaning of Christmas and why we celebrate it. I mentioned why should I get punished by not being able to go through stores to see what new decorating ideas they have that I might incorporate in our village and trains display that I put up just because other parents don’t want their children to get hyped up with “gimme gimme”.

I think I have a healthy blend of the true meaning of Christmas with the fun of Santa :) We started working on our village yesterday (11th of Nov) as it takes several weeks to get it and the trains that go through it all set up. We always take our grandchildren out on the first Saturday of December to a Christmas tree farm to chop down the perfect tree and then spend the day decorating it. We have a memory tree. Nothing matches on it really. We have ornaments that mean something to us. Each of our chidlren, their spouses and our grandchildren have their own ornaments and they place it on the tree. We have ornaments that one of my husband’s grandmothers made for our children 30 years ago. Each ornament has a memory attached and these are discussed as they are placed on the tree. It gives me time to spend with our grandchildren talking about school, what’s going on in their lives etc.

We always open presents at midnight on the 24th because that was what we decided to do when my husband and I had our first Christmas. Our Christmases are a blend of long time traditions mixed with the Spirit of Christmas.

What are your thoughts? Is it too early to get started for Christmas? Do you think stores should have a “date” that they have to follow to not put out their merchandise? What is your reasoning?

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Spanking in Nursery

Stacie Duce, over at Mormon Times, recently related an experience in which a Nursery worker in one ward spanked someone’s child for being unruly.

I recently got a call from a nursery leader who went on vacation and came back to find her class had been a vortex of chaos in her absence. Actually, it wasn’t that bad. But her mild-mannered assistant, who grew up during an era when spanking was an appropriate form of schoolroom discipline, had swatted the backside of a perpetually aggressive nursery child.

She added:

In defense of the spanker, apparently, it worked. The boy settled down and the parents did not need to be disrupted from other classrooms in the church.

Spanking should be a decision left to parents. Period.

In a church setting, I do not believe that parents should expect Primary workers (Nursery or otherwise) to be their children’s disciplinarians, nor do I think Primary workers should expect they shouldn’t disturb the children’s parents.

Parents have a responsibility to raise their children, and that includes disciplining them to behave properly in social settings. No one else should do this work for them.

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Unconventional

In a lot of ways, I was an unconventional elders quorum president. It’s been over six months since I was released, but I was going over the collective six years I served two terms as elders quorum president. I realised some of the initiatives I took wouldn’t be seen in your average elders quorum.

Here are a handful:

  • Assigning an 18-year-old elder as a home teaching companion to a 17-year-old priest
  • Announcing the presidency would no longer phone for home teaching reports, but expected the companionships to phone us
  • Accepting service done for an assigned family as home teaching even if no message was left
  • Calling an 18-year-old priest as a secretary
  • Assigning my counsellors to attend ward council quarterly
  • Fighting to prevent advancement to high priest based on age

Have you done anything unconventional in your calling?

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