Pornography & Attractiveness

Posted on 08 May 2006 by Kim Siever

In the inaugarl episode of the Mormon Archipelago Podcast, Elisabeth of BCC reviewed the book Confronting Pornography: A Guide to Prevention and Recovery for Individuals, Loved Ones and Leaders. In part, she quoted the following from page 153 of the book:

It?��Ǩ�Ѣs not uncommon for a wife to believe that if she were more attractive, more alluring, if she were ?��Ǩ?�enough for him?��Ǩ��, he wouldn?��Ǩ�Ѣt turn to these perfect images of other women.

I do not know if every woman faced with her husband’s addiction to pornography asks herself these question. If that is the case (I can only assume the doctor and social workers who authored the book have done their research), why? Why do women feel pornography is about attractiveness? Why do they feel their level of attractiveness is the solution? Or are women correct in these assertion.

[It was a good first podcast, by the way. I normally find RT's podcasting style boring, but he did a good job here.]

Popularity: 2% [?]

Government & Families

Posted on 17 Mar 2006 by Kim Siever

The Deseret News reported a vacation guru is calling for a boycott of Kanab, Utah, for the following reason:

[Kanab] city leaders passed a “natural family” resolution expressing support for “upholding the marriage of a woman to a man, and a man to a woman as ordained by God. The resolution, approved in Kanab in January and drafted by the conservative Sutherland Institute, goes on to encourage homes to be open to a “full quiver of children” and young women to become “wives, homemakers and mothers.”

I’m not so sure municipal governments should be getting into the business of mandating family sizes and career options for women.

Popularity: 1% [?]

Polygamy Talent

Posted on 01 Mar 2006 by Kim Siever

Brigham Young stated the following in a discourse on 31 August 1873:

Now, where a man in this Church says, “I don’t want but one wife, I will live my religion with one,” he will perhaps be saved in the celestial kingdom; but when he gets there he will not find himself in possession of any wife at all. He has had a talent that he has hid up. He will come forward and say, “Here is that which thou gavest me, I have not wasted it, and here is the one talent,” and he will not enjoy it, but it will be taken and given to those who have improved the talents they received, and he will find himself without any wife, and he will remain single for ever and ever.

(Journal of Discourses Vol. 16, p.166)

Is this an actual teaching of the church, that monogamous men will have their wives taken from them because they would not marry others?

Popularity: 3% [?]

Marriage & Cynicism

Posted on 13 Feb 2006 by Kim Siever

I started listening to episode 20 of the This Mormon Life podcast this morning. I would have listened to it last week, but my iPod wasn’t syncing podcast for some reason.

Anyhow, I really enjoyed the analogy they started where they compared cynicism in the Church with stages of marriage.

The honeymoon stage corresponds to the stage of our youth (or a converts first years). It is during this stage when we are blind to imperfections and are under the impression that everything is ideal and imperfect.

During the stage right after the honeymoon (not sure what it would be labelled, maybe something with the word dissonance in it), quirks or annoying habits start to appear. From a ecclesiastical standpoint, this could be the stage when we come to a realisation of (or are exposed to) inconsistencies or imperfections in the Church (whether apostles debating doctrine, actual church history, repulsive statements from leaders, offending actions of members, etc).

During this second stage, many marriages end up in divorce. Likewise, many members at this stage in their faith fall away. Some even become very bitter, a parallel to bitter divorces.

From what I have heard so far, it doesn’t seem like Dallas, Janelle and Amanda go much further in the analogy (granted I haven’t heard the entire thing yet), but I think there is at least a third stage. In this stage in marriage, a person comes to a realisation that quirks and habits are inconsequential in a marriage and love amounts to more than that. They realise they need to adjust their way of thinking and how they view their spouse.

Same goes for the Church. As Amanda said, we come to a realisation that we need to accept the new things we learn, adapt our understanding to match the things we learn, or completely reject the thins we learn. Successful church membership, like successful marriages, I believe cannot be built upon rejection.

Popularity: 2% [?]

Polyandry

Posted on 24 Jan 2006 by Kim Siever

It has been documented that of the 33 verifiable marriage Joseph Smith entered, 1/3 of them were with women who were currently married when they married Joseph Smith. Is there a logical explanation for these dual marriages (polygamy and polyandry) or was it simply a commandment from God?

Popularity: 4% [?]

Purpose of Marriage

Posted on 05 Jun 2004 by Kim Siever

In yesterday?��Ǩ�Ѣs issue of AskMen.com Newsletter, the weekly question was, ?��Ǩ?�In your opinion, what is the main purpose of marriage??��Ǩ��

The first responder was quoted as saying the following:

There is absolutely no purpose of marriage other than to raise a family…Other than children, I don’t think marriage is that important.

Do people really believe this? Do they truly feel that there is no other purpose to being married than to raising children? What about the trust and commitment a marriage develops in the partners?

What does everyone else think? What is the purpose of marriage?